Lullaby
by Yukikoinu
Summary: Naruto tells Sasuke how he feel about him but the answer is not what he expected.Lost in a world of sorrow how will the two of them be by the end of this ordeal? Yaoi! This is based on the song "Whiskey Lullaby." Enjoy.


Yuki desu

Yuki desu!

I'm so sorry for not up dating in forever! My sis moved in with all three of her kids, her boy friend, and a friend from her job so I have zero computer time, I have writer's block on "Paper can't cover shame" and I think I might give up on it, oh, and school started too so yea. So to make it up to all of you faithful readers I'm am doing this one shot to try and help cope with my block and hopefully it will help.

**WARNIGS: **Character deaths, suicide, drinking, denial, language, and Yaoi and a lot of time skipping. (Sorry but it is necessary)

**RATING: T**

**TITLE: ****Lullaby**

**SUMMERY: **This story takes place in modern time. Naruto finally gets the courage to tell Sasuke how he feels but none knew what would happen. Based on the song "Whisky Lullaby". Better than I make it out to be I promise.

**DISCLAIMER:** If I owned Naruto Sasuke would be fucking him in to walls and I haven't seen that happen so no I do not own Naruto.

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"Naruto?" Naruto turned to see his old friend Sakura waving to him from Ino's flower shop. Naruto had been friends with Sakura ever since they were kids in grade school. And as his best friend she had long ago discovered his crush on their other friend Sasuke and, no matter how much he begged her not to, she was always trying to help him get Sasuke's attention. But most of her plans failed…miserably.

"Hi Sakura, how's Ino? I didn't see her yesterday," Naruto said as he jogged up to the pink haired girl. Sakura pushed some stray hairs back behind her ear and shrugged.

"Oh her, she's got the flu. But aside from that Naruto what are we planning for tonight?" she asked clasping her hands together with that evil look in her eye. No matter how long he had known her that look always gave him the shivers.

"Tonight…what do you mean…I don't have any plans, do I?" he asked.

Sakura smacked her forehead and shook her head. "Please tell me you didn't forget the big bash happening over at Sasuke's place? You know the one that Ino and I spent months to get Sasuke to agree on. No you wouldn't forget that, now would you?" Sakura said her face falling flat at the last line.

Naruto rubbed the back of his head and laughed nervously. Yea he had forgotten and knowing Sakura that would lead him to having his head ripped clean off is shoulders of by her…if he was lucky.

"Oh! How did I know you would forget! If I hadn't planed so much for this night you would be dead," she sighed. "But you need to look your best which means I can't kill you, so count yourself lucky."

Naruto sighed in relief. Sometimes her obsession with his love life saved his own life.

"I'm sorry Sakura I-"

"Save it Naruto," Sakura cut him off holding up her hand. "Come on we have a lot of work to do," she said as she grabbed his hand and started dragging him down the road.

"Work? What do you mean work?" Naruto asked franticly trying to pull away. "Sakura?"

"I mean since you've forgotten about the party, I know you have nothing ready. So I'm going to help you get ready?" Sakura told him with an evil smile. This, however, Naruto knew translated meant "HELL".

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"Ouch! Hay Sakura watch it will ya?" Naruto shouted pushing Sakura hand away from his eyes.

"Oh hush it Naruto, don't be a baby I'm almost done," she said pushing his back down while not stopping with putting the last touches of make up on Naruto. "There, now that didn't hurt too bad did it?" Naruto rolled his eyes and pouted. That eyeliner shit hurt! It would be a cold day in hell before he ever let Sakura dress him up again.

"Remind me again why I have to put on girls make up. I may be gay but I'm far from a drag queen," Naruto stated glaring at her; Sakura just shook her head.

"The reason your wearing it is because it makes you look better and brings out the unique color of your eyes," she explained for the ten thousandth time that night while she packed up her make up kit. It had taken her over twenty minutes alone just to convince him to let her put anything on him, but she was proud of her handy work.

"Alright," Naruto huffed. "Now can I look?"

"Sure," Sakura said turning Naruto around in her vanity chair to look at himself in the huge mirror on her dresser.

Naruto's mouth dropped at his reflection. He looked hot. The eyeliner did bring out his eyes but the ensemble that Sakura had on him would have all the girls drooling. He had on a choker, a tight, sleeveless, black leather zip up top, with red armbands. And a pair of skin tight, black leather pants with three belts and an assortment of chains hanging off the sides. But the best part was the boots. They were the same black combat ones that he had been saving up to get!

"Naruto, save the flies for the frogs, close your mouth," Sakura giggled as she taped his chin for emphasis.

Naruto's eyes filled with tears as he turned toward her. Sakura looked down at him and promptly freaked.

"Oh Naruto, don't cry! Think of the eyeliner!"(1)

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"Thank you again Sakura," Naruto said. They were on their way to Sasuke's house and nothing could shut Naruto up about the boots Sakura had given him.

"Naruto like I said, its no big deal. After all you do need to look your best for the party. And I thought, "What the hell", and decided to give you the boots as an early birthday gift," Sakura winked. "A really early birthday gift."

Naruto laughed gently pushing Sakura in the arm…only to get himself pushed into a tree. They both laughed and kept on walking but this time in comfortable silence till Sasuke's house came in to view. Naruto froze mid step and faced Sakura.

"Well now's your big chance," Sakura smiled. "Go get him."

"I will," Naruto said as he headed in to the blaring lights and sounds of the party.

When Naruto got use to the lights he saw many of the people he knew. However one person he never thought of as the party type was there. Shikamaru was over next to the speakers…SLEEPING! (2) Naruto just shook his head. How Shikamaru could sleep with pounding music in his ears was beyond him. However Shikamaru wasn't his target for that night, no he needed to find Sasuke.

Naruto shifted through the crowd and in to the back garden. If he knew Sasuke as well as he thought, he would be as far away as he could from the noise of the party; but still have his house within view. Just to make sure his house didn't get demolished by his guest.

As Naruto walked through the garden a shift to his right drew his attention to a patch of roses. Looking over them Naruto spotted Sasuke sitting with his own MP3 player blasting music in to his ears. (3) Naruto chuckled at the thought of catching Sasuke off guard. Oh this would be fun.

"Don't even think about it Dobe."

Naruto jumped at the sound of Sasuke's voice, which resulted in him falling smack in the middle of the rose bush.

"OUCH!" Naruto cried as he tried to push his way out of the roses with no avail. Sasuke looked over at Naruto and heaved a sigh.

"Hold still Dobe," Sasuke said as he gently pulled Naruto free from the thorns of the bush. Once free Naruto looked at Sasuke and blushed at how close they were. Sasuke's arms were wrapped around his torso to help him up. Not only that but Sasuke's face was but a mere couple inches from his.

"Thank you," Naruto said gently pulling away from Sasuke. Naruto sat in the grass off to Sasuke's side and pulled his legs up to his chest to rest his head on his knees. He sighed.

"Hn," the two of them sat in the garden in silence well in to the night. However as the hour approached one Sasuke shifted and got up. He brushed himself off took a glance at Naruto. As he started to walk away Naruto called after him.

"Hay, where ya going Sasuke?" Sasuke looked back and shrugged.

"Back to my house so I can call an end to this mayhem before my it falls apart," Naruto laughed and got up to follow Sasuke back.

The walk back to Sasuke's house was long and silent much to Naruto's dismay. He was hoping that Sasuke would start a conversation so he could have the chance to ask Sasuke if he liked him. But that was a long shot considering that Sasuke wasn't much of a talker to begin with.

When Naruto could hear the blasting music from Sasuke's house he heaved a sigh and made up his mind to ask.

"Hay Sasuke?"

"Hn," Sasuke stopped and looked back at Naruto over his shoulder. Naruto gulped and twined his fingers together.

"Well Sasuke I wanted to ask you something," Naruto started. Sasuke turned to fully face him and Naruto took as an ok to continue. "Well you see…I…I've been thinking. And, well…I," Naruto paused and took a deep breath; he could feel his face heating up. But he had to do it he had been putting this off for far too long. "I…love you."

Sasuke's face fell as he turned away from Naruto and began to walk back to his house once more.

"Wait Sasuke, you haven't given me an answ-"

"Because why would I give an answer to such an absurd question?" Sasuke yelled as he turned back to face Naruto. "What were you expecting, huh? For me to pronounce my love for you as well and we live happily ever after?" Sasuke turned back to his house and started walking. "Wake up Naruto; this is the real world."

Naruto eyes began to fill with tears as he ran past Sasuke and in to the house where he bumped in to Sakura.

"Hay Naruto how'd it go with Sasuke?" she asked. From her flushed face and glossy eyes anyone could see she was half drunk.

Naruto cast a look at his shoes and refused to look up. Sakura straitened up and put a hand on Naruto's shoulder rubbing it gently in a soothing manner whispering comforting words to him. Naruto started to calm down but Sasuke entered and Naruto took off out of the house. He ran as fast as his feet would carry him down the road ignoring the frantic calls from Sakura to come back.

Back? Back to the place his heart was shattered? No, he would never go back there again.

And with that thought locked in his mind Naruto disappeared in to the night.

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The sky was clear of any clouds as Sakura walked to Naruto's apartment. It had been years since that night at Sasuke's house…unfortunately Naruto never recovered from the shock of it all.

Sighing Sakura walked up the stairs that led to Naruto's apartment. The outside of the apartment was atrocious. Dead plants hung from broken pots, the welcome mat had had it, and the window was covered in a very thick coating of dust and grime. In general, the place looked abandoned. But Sakura knew better.

Sakura rummaged in her bag for the key Naruto had given her a few years back; after he decided he was never going to leave his house _ever_ again. After looking for about five minutes she finally found the key in the bottom of her purse. She unlocked the door and entered the dark apartment shutting the door firmly behind her.

She flicked the light on to find the filthy carpet floor littered with alcohol bottles of all kinds. Even though Naruto never left his house he always had alcohol of some kind on him at all times, though as to where he got it was still a mystery. After that night Naruto was always drunk. Once when Sakura had found him sober he told her, "That being drunk took the pain. If only for a while."

Sakura sighed once more before starting to move about the room, cleaning up the mess that was left to rot there on the floor. Eww, a weak old ham sandwich…with an olive? Sakura screeched when the "olive" jumped off the sandwich toward her. (4) She flung the sandwich across the room, with it falling apart in midair, to have it land with a plop.

Sakura peeked through her hands that covered her face to see what the sandwich had landed on. However, after seeing what it had landed on she burst in to hysterical fits of laughter. It had landed ham down right on top of a half-conscious Naruto. Naruto pealed the rotten food from his face squinting at it to see what it was.

"So that's where my sandwich went," Naruto said holding the offending piece of meat and bread between his two fingers.

Naruto, being half-asleep, sniffed the sandwich to gauge if it was still edible. One sniff was all it took to wake him up and he promptly dropped the sandwich back to the floor from which it came.

"I'm sorry Naruto," Sakura gasped between bouts of laughter.

"I'm sure you are," Naruto said as he carefully maneuvered his way through the mess on the floor and in to the kitchen. Sakura followed close behind him, her laughter slowly starting to calm down.

Upon entering the kitchen Naruto grabbed the first thing on the counter it was coincidently alcohol. Naruto put it to his lips and guzzled it down without stopping. Sakura sighed at how poorly a state Naruto had let himself get in to.

Naruto no longer wore the orange monstrosity of an outfit he did before this all had happened. Now all he wore was the gray sweat pants that Iruka-sensei had gotten him for his birthday a few years back. The very ones he had claimed were too ugly to wear.

"Naruto…" Sakura's eyes trailed to the floor. "It's been three years, Sasuke-" The smashing of a bottle snapped Sakura's attention back to Naruto. He had blood trailing down his arm and on to the glass covered floor.

"Oh my God, Naruto are you alright?" Sakura panicked as she grabbed for his hand. "Let me look at that."

Naruto snatched his hand back from her and turned. "Never mention Sasuke ever again. Now leave."

"But Naruto…"

"I said go!" Naruto shouted his eyes beginning to tear up. He knew Sakura had not meant to hurt him but he couldn't take it.

"All right Naruto," Sakura sighed. "But promise me you'll take care of that hand. Ok?" with those parting words Sakura left not looking back.

Naruto looked at the door depression crowding his heart once more as he stumbled his way back to his room. It's true, what Sakura had said, three long years had passed. But time did not heal any of his pain. His heart still cried out for Sasuke to love him even if that was an impossible feat.

Naruto stumbled on to his room and on to the bed grabbing the whisky bottle that had been on his bedside table. He tipped the bottle up guzzling the last bit of it down as though he was a man in the desert without water. Yet this time the alcohol was not enough. Thanks to Sakura drudging up his past memories of the raven-haired boy the alcohol could not help him forget.

Violently Naruto shook his head bashing it against whatever surface he could find. Pulling his hands to his head to try to block the memories Naruto noticed that the empty bottle was still in his hand. He let out a wordless cry as he hurled the bottle at the wall. The glass smashed in to a million shards, falling like rain back on to the carpet. It still wouldn't end the torrent of painful memories.

"I give up!" Naruto shouted reaching into his bedside table. He would end it once and for all.

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Sakura was still a little worried about Naruto as she made her way to Ino's flower shop. Naruto had looked so…empty. Sakura was rudely shoved out of her thoughts as someone crashed in to her. Falling hard to the ground Sakura thought of ripping the head off who ever had pushed her.

"Hn, watch it."

Sakura noticed that voice. "You!" she shouted as she stood quickly to her feet. She had not seen Sasuke since that night three years ago. In fact no one had seen him for the longest time, though rumor had it that he had gone to the country to see his old home from his childhood.

"Hn," well he was as articulate as ever.

"I thought you had left for good," Sakura stated looking Sasuke up and down. Wherever he had gone it hadn't done him much good she mused. He looked thinner to her and a little on the empty side, just like Naruto.

"As you can plainly see that is not the truth," he said his eyes turning softer as he spoke. "How is…" Sasuke paused he was not sure how his sudden concern for _him_ would be taken. It was indeed true he had left and with good reason. After the night Naruto had confessed to him something had been nagging at the back of his brain. He had gone back to his birth home to sort out his thoughts but now he feared he might be too late.

"Naruto?" Sakura finished his question. "You have the balls to ask that after all you've done to him!" Sasuke flinched but if Sakura saw she chose to ignore it. "Well since you asked I'll tell you. He's been getting worse ever since that night and it is all you fault. He hasn't left his house, he looks like the living dead, and if I even mention you around him he goes mad with grief. What you did to him, I will never forgive you for it," by the end of her speech Sakura's face had taken up the shade of fresh blood and seemed to have its own light about it. (5)

Sasuke felt the weight of her words hit him hard. Everything she had said was true and even now he was ashamed with himself over it. That night he was in shock from that event and said what his parents would have told him to say to Naruto. Even after their deaths he was still a pawn in their game. Sasuke sighed. How was he going to tell her what had happened.

"Sakura that night-" a loud gun shot was heard and time seemed to freeze for both Sakura and Sasuke. That shot had come from near Naruto's. Blood drained from their faces as Sakura uttered the true fear of what Sasuke was thinking.

"Naruto," Sakura took off with Sasuke hot on her tail winding through the streets well into the bad side of town. Not even pausing to tell Sasuke to stay away Sakura dug out the key to Naruto's apartment as she dashed up the stairs to his door. Oh, please don't let me be right, was her frantic mantra as she opened the door. The door creaked open as she slowly entered the apartment; it was still the same as she had left it earlier that day.

"Naruto," she called gently in to the apartment leaving the door open as she walked farther in, Sasuke still fallowing closely. "Come on Naruto. I know your in here come on out," she called tears gathering in her eyes at the silence. "N-Naruto, stop it now it's not funny anymore."

Sasuke took quick glances around the apartment in all its decaying glory. Sakura wasn't kidding when she had told him of Naruto's well being or in this case lack-there-of. A muffled gasp was heard form down the hall then frantic sobbing. Sasuke maneuvered his way through the mess on the floor and down the cold hall. A coppery smell caught his nose as he rounded the last turn to where Sakura stood. Nothing could have prepared him for what he saw.

Naruto lay there on the bed in a pool of his own blood. Even though his face was covered in the red substance he seemed at peace and was smiling. Sasuke's eyes scanned the body to see what had caused this, murder or suicide. As his eves roamed he saw the gun that lay in Naruto's left hand yet in his right hand lay something white.

Maneuvering around the sobbing mass that was Sakura, Sasuke slowly made his way to the bed. Reaching the bedside he gently lifted the white paper out of Naruto's hand. It was a note. Tears welled in Sasuke's eyes at what the letter said.

"**I'll love him till I die**."

The letter was so simple yet it held so much for him. How could Naruto still love him after what he had done that night? The quiet murmuring from beside him knocked Sasuke out of his mind and back to reality. He looked down to see Sakura, her red-rimmed eyes boring in to him.

"I'll never for give you, not for this," she hissed. "I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU!"

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"-And so with these parting words we say: may you find true happiness where you are now," the priest looked about at the black clothed friends of the poor dead boy, all of them sniffling and crying. It was not the first time he had seen this and he knew it would not be the last. "Amen."

Sasuke stood off to the side as they lay Naruto's casket below the lone cherry blossom tree in the field outside of town. It had been Naruto's favorite place to play when he was younger. Sasuke use to watch him from the branches as Naruto sat on the swing. He could sit on that old swing there for hours and never get tired.

As the crowd started to dissipate the priest walked over to him and touched his shoulder, saying only one thing in passing to the young Uchiha.

"I am sorry for your loss."

Sasuke nodded his head as the old man left him there to his thoughts. He had felt it during the ceremony. Everyone's eyes boring holes in to his back with looks look of pure hatred. They all blamed him for their loss of the lively young blonde boy and he had to admit, he didn't blame them. It was his fault entirely.

As twilight started to close in, Sasuke took a final glance at the grave of the only person to ever try to understand him. Holding his hand out over the grave Sasuke dropped the ring he had meant to give Naruto as an apology. It was silver with a sapphire gem delicately placed in the center of it. It reminded him of the blue eyes he longed to see once more, but that dream had gone. With that Sasuke left, the ring shining from a top the grave in the setting sun.

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Fall turned to winter, winter turned to spring, spring turned to summer, and summer turned to fall once more. Time passed and without a person noticing years had gone by since Naruto's untimely death. But the hate for _him_ was not forgotten.

Sasuke sat at his usual spot at the bar and even though it had been…what, years everyone still blamed him for Naruto's death. Tipping his drink back up to his mouth Sasuke finished it and left, stumbling out the door.

As Sasuke walked the dark empty streets question after question came popping up in his hazy mind. Why did Naruto have to die? Did Naruto love him all that time? Why didn't he die instead of Naruto?

The red haze covering Sasuke's vision darkened as he saw the first person to ever truly loath him for Naruto's unhappiness. Sakura Haruno. She looked better than most now a days. Shortly after Naruto's death she had found someone who helped her through her sadness. Her green eyes filled with hate as she spotted him.

"So, finally decided to show your face?" she sneered at him placing her hands on her hips. Her eyes bore in to him and he felt as though she saw through to his very soul.

Sasuke looked at her covering his mouth as to hide the fact that he had been drinking. Even though he would drink till the point of passing out he found himself repulsive for it. He never wanted anyone to find out, least it give them one more reason to leave him adrift in this sea of hatred.

"S-Sakura…I…don't…have…time…now," Sasuke said slowly pronouncing each word carefully as to not give away his drunken state.

"No you don't do you," she stated slowly walking away. "Not even for Naruto."

Sasuke turned quickly towards Sakura's retreating form causing himself to lose balance and fall to the awaiting pavement. The impact of the rough ground knocked Sasuke half to his senses. No he didn't have time, did he, not for anyone, at least not anymore.

Thunder roared as the sky started to cry. It was so ironic was it not? Sasuke could not shed a tear due to the years of misery, yet the sky seemed to laugh at him by showing him his own sorrow.

Sasuke lay there for almost a full twenty minuets before he hauled himself to his feet. His life was now nothing but shambles around him. He could see nothing but black for his future and his past was far too painful to look back on now. What could he do? He was nothing but a pawn from the start of his life. Even now, with his misery, he still was.

He traveled the back roads to his house slowly in the pouring rain. His energy gone now vanished with his life and will to live.

As he reached his house it seemed more foreboding to him than it would to most who saw it. The dark windows and untamed manner of the garden were creepy in the downpour of rain.

Sasuke entered the house not bothering with the lights any more. The dark fit his demeanor too much for light. He made his way to his room not even pausing to change out of his wet clothes.

He reached the bed pulling his legs up to his chest. Off to his right stood a picture of him and Naruto back when he could smile with his blonde Dobe. Picking the picture up Sasuke held it fast as he carefully reached under his pillow. Every thing seemed to slow down and mold together.

A flash to his left caught his attention and held it. It looked like his blonde Dobe, his Naruto. But something was wrong his smile was all wrong it was sad, longing. Sasuke smiled at him as his eyes closed embracing the darkness.

At least he was able to him…one…last…time.

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Three days passed before Sasuke's body was found.

A ceremony very much like Naruto's was held under the same tree. Even if she held a great animosity toward Sasuke the way she had found him. Well, she thought, he at the very least deserved this as a final request. He and Naruto were friends before this had all happened.

The ceremony ended but Sakura stayed for a little longer just watching as the new blossoms on the tree started to dace in the wind. The swing swaying gently in the breeze with them.

As her hair caught the wind it blew in to her face gently brushing her eyes causing her to be blinded for a moment. As she brushed her hair back she saw the figures of Sasuke and Naruto.

Sasuke gently pushing Naruto on the swing both with a serine look upon their faces. Sakura kept watching the scene unfold as Sasuke stopped the swing to gently lay a kiss on a smiling Naruto.

"I'm sure they are both happy," the old priest said startling her as he walked up behind her. She had turned her head away form the tender scene as the priest came but as she turned to look back to it, it was gone. But she guessed it was for the best.

She turned nodding to the old man then she carefully helped him down the hill, taking one final glance back to the graves of her friends.

"I'm sure their happy too," She said as the breeze gently blew blossoms in to the air. "I'm sure they are."

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(1) My friend did that to me, the very same thing! It does HURT!

(2) I had to we all know Shikamaru could do that if he tried.

(3) I'm old fashion I like MP3's better than Ipod's.

(4) Again this did happen to me. When I was helping clean this lady's house and instead of Naruto the sandwich landed on my sis the same way. It was funny till she threw it back.

(5) Gasp! I did it I made Sakura not like Sasuke. And yes it was relevant to the story as you saw. I personally don't like Sakura too much if she's clingy.

I thank you so much to whoever had read this it made me cry writing the ending. I know I was the one who killed them but it was good. Or at least I think so. Well for those of you who loved it please let me know because I love reviews and nothing would make me happier than to see them and I need new ideas for fiction. Though I more than likely use more song to create fics, so if you have a request tell me and I'll try to make it. I love you all so much. Cookies and kisses for all.


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